View Full Version : Computers and the MAD CLICKER

September 14th, 2007, 10:58 PM
This has to do with new computers, so you have been warned.

My new coworker was telling me of these computer problems she's been having with her brand new Dell laptop she bought. She said it would never connect and had all kinds of stuff happening with it. She had it in the car with her (I dunno why, would YOU take a $1200 laptop with you to deliver pizzas???) so after our shifts were up I took a look at it for her.

Holy crap, it's the NICE one they sell. ALL the bells and whistles. Vista, hundreds of gigs of hdd and over a gig of ram. She told me that she got it for business and she wanted a turn-key machine, basically. Now that's for the background...

It wouldn't connect cause she kept "mad clicking" the stay disconnected button, RIGHT AFTER SHE HIT CONNECT! It was trying to get a weak signal, is what. And when I tried to tell her HOW to lock onto a signal more, she stopped and asked me about plug-ins. Of course, I tried to switch gears with her, but this kept happening, she kept hitting connect and disconnect, wondering the whole time WHY it wouldn't connect! There was a driver problem with the chip after the last service pack (that's win for ya) and so it needed to be updated. There was limited connectivity, enough to do that, but then she went off about Word and whatever else entered her head at the time. She said it was fine "until UTEP got their hands on it (UTEP=University of Texas at El Paso). What they did was turn ON all the bells and whistles. Past this she wouldn't listen to me. She said that Dell really let her down (tech support nightmare) and now her computer was worthless. I gave up.

What I told her was she bought a computer that was too much for her. She EMPHASIZED that it was for business and she went top notch for that reason, and wouldn't hear another word. I then told her she was trying to drive this Cadillac like it was a beater Mustang and it ain't gonna work.

Talking to her was like talking to a WALL. No wonder Dell gave up! She couldn't stay focused one any ONE problem, let alone an over-the-phone troubleshooting session! She couldn't even stay on target while talking with me for 15 frekkin minutes!

What I DIDN'T tell her, was that it was too much computer for her (she even told me she failed her "computer class" whatever it was specifically); this is like talking to a WALL, your highness; you have to DO what tech support TELLS you to do, and stop your MAD CLICKING! She was clicking all over the place, icons, popup messages, security warnings and that damn CONNECT THEN DISCONNECT!!!!

I took a breath, and told her good luck.

MAD CLICKER ~noun~ a person that clicks text box messages automatically, regardless of what information is being presented and regardless of what affect it has on their computer of any manufacture, and any operating system


September 15th, 2007, 02:39 AM
My mother would do something similar. As we all know, DOS has a keyboard buffer. You can type more commands as the last one is running. Well, Windows has what I call "mouse-ahead". It has a mouse activity buffer also. So, as Windows would be starting up, my mom would click on the IE browser icon. Nothing would happen as Windows would still be busy creating restore images, virtual memory, all that startup stuff. My mom would bang away on the icon. Pretty soon, here would come 15 copies of IE, all trying to load at the same time. Windows would get so swamped with virtual memory that you couldn't even close some of them down. That would happen at least twice a week for longer than I can remember.

September 15th, 2007, 05:41 AM
FWIW, I've worked with a fair number of folks who have trouble differentiating between the meaning of single-click, double-click, and right-click. These are mad clickers, too, in that I would never want one of their used mice, as I'm certain the buttons would be worn out.

It can be hard for people who have a reasonably good reaction time to take a breath and wait. I try to point out things like hourglass cursors or hard drive lights to let them know that the computer is working on something right now and really can't respond right away. Of course, for those really desperate, maybe it's time for a new OS? Something text-only, or with fewer bugs, or that has less crap running in the background?

nige the hippy
September 15th, 2007, 08:05 AM
My wife does the same & continually complains about the computer being slow. I continually point out that having 15 instances of IE open at the same time does that. She also always stuffs the washing machine to bursting point. I continually wonder how she got her high IQ.:rolleyes:

September 15th, 2007, 08:10 AM
How about an IQ test before you can buy a computer?

Tell her I'll give her a hundred bucks and a model 100 for the Dell :)

Terry Yager
September 15th, 2007, 08:24 AM
Four instant messengers and five p2p file sharing progs running in the background (along with every adware known to mankind) will render a 233MHz useless for web-surfing. (If ya don't believe it, ask my daughter).


September 15th, 2007, 03:41 PM
I hate to be sexist here, but, have you noticed that all these anecdotes concern women?

I mean, I've taught women how to replace motherboards before just using a phone and a webcam, but, they are few and far between.

I just thought that the gender thing was strange.

September 15th, 2007, 08:43 PM
I dunno, my mom is on the older side of the scale, and every computer she's had has run great, she was using a Pentium 200 MMX that I piueced together for next to nothing for her in 2002 up until this year, and it's still very useable or so I hear, and now she has a business level HP from E-bay and that one runs just as good as the last one except faster (Pentium 4 3.0 GHz with XP).

however, she has a friend who has computer trouble all the time, and my ex-girlfriend, who was a "wannabe hacker/cracker" of all things (she could'nt hack her way out of a paper bag), and was always bugging me to put Kazaa on there again (not again, I hosed the hard drive because of that damn program, and she had the f***ing nerve to bitch that her Diablo savegame was gone).

However, it is not just women. I work with a supervisor who seems to be blind to the auto-save feature in Excel, and thinks that the spreadsheet for excel is a "separate program". I work in a building with many people, apparently combined with all the computer illiterates in the area, because everywhere else I go I have no problem talking computers with Seattlites. I'm amazed my other computer savvy co-workers don't bring up the insanity more often.

I find the worst computer users are those that seem to think they know everything about computers, yet know nothing. You know the type, the ones that think they are absolute experts at everything because of some piece of paper from a major college (despite the piece of paper being in something like marine biology or becoming an english teacher). I'm sorry, but computers are like GUITARS. They are easy to learn, but DIFFICULT to master. I've been working/playing with computers 7 years, I can fix a computer in a few minutes in most cases, but I'm still learning new things all the time.

A really funny one is when they ask for your help, but thenn they spend the next 20 minutes trying to prove their tech eliteness to you. If you were so "elite" you would not need my help, I'm just a lowly A+ Certified hardware wizard, there's a lot out there beyond that. I don't spend 40 minutes trying to show what a PITA I can be to the network tech with the Cisco router down , I'm usually trying to learn what he's doing. Computers are more than microchips and Microsoft Windows, lots more.

September 23rd, 2007, 09:32 PM
Man...my wife is the absolute worst.
I come home, worked 8 hours, plus probably 4 hours into the wee hours of the morning, and then she ALWAYS tosses something at me...

Since I upgraded her from a P3-866/512MB/40GB (sucked on XP SP2) to a Dell P4, it has been a non-stop tech support parade.

<sigh> sometimes I hate what I do, 'cuz everyone wants to leech knowledge and free support. Like I have nothing better to do in my free time.


September 24th, 2007, 11:04 AM
AMEN to that.

"Hi, I got your number from (fill in the blank) and they said you might be able to help me out. I'm having a problem with (fill in the blank). Could you tell me how to fix it?"

Yes, sure I could, and I will, the first day you go to your day-job and work for free.

September 24th, 2007, 10:43 PM
Tony, YMMV but at work I have a P3-733/512MB with XP SP2, and it runs mighty fine for both web surfing, photo editing and of course programming (through a ssh session, but still). I think how much a computer is capable to do and how often it crashes depends greatly on who operates it; how many small unneeded gadgets, messenger programs and spywares are installed. Only in some occassions when I try to run a whole suite of different programs simultaneously, it hickups, but I'm afraid even my home PC (Athlon64 3800+/1 GB/XP SP2) would in those cases.