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Thread: HandyMan

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Saginaw, MI, USA 48601
    Blog Entries

    Default HandyMan

    My latest poem/rap:

    The HandyMan

    Hey there baby,
    I got my JB, maybe,
    I can git 'er done,
    By the setting sun.

    I can make it,
    I can break it,
    I can do my thang,
    Even Red Green knows I'm the duct-tape king!

    If it's broken, I can fix it.
    If it's whole, I can nix it.

    I'll put 'er all together
    The best way that I've known.
    If it falls apart again
    Then you're on your own!

    No follow-up,
    No support pages.
    I follow the same rules
    Passed down through the ages.

    As-is means that you will have to bear
    Any worries or concerns or any other care.

    I don't want it you can have it,
    I don't wanna share.
    Don't cry on my shoulder,
    Cause I've been there!

    If ya get it from me,
    There's no guarantee.
    If it blows up in your face,
    Well dat's da breaks!

    You can sue me, you can do me,
    You can try and screw me!
    But I'll turn right around,
    And put you in the ground!

    With some Duco Cement and a hot glue gun,
    I can hold it all together till the day is done!

    If it's metal,
    I can weld it.
    If it's plastic,
    I can melt it!

    And when all else fails,
    The vice-grip prevails!

    Last edited by Terry Yager; November 5th, 2006 at 02:38 PM.
    Teach your children how to think, not what, and hold 'em close, not tight.

    Please visit the Vintage-Computer Wiki. Contributers welcome.

  2. #2


    Nooo, not vice-grips, duct tape!

    Edit: Ooops, I see duct tape in der already.

    I like the "if it's broke, I can fix it, if it's whole, I can nix it" part the best.
    Last edited by chuckcmagee; October 16th, 2006 at 03:01 PM.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    in the basement


    Hey Terry,

    You can add this (ripped off from James Taylor) to the end of your

    Here is the main thing that I want to say,
    I'm busy 24 hours a day.
    I fix broken VC's, I know that I truly can.
    Hey everybody, I am your handyman.
    Comma, comma, comma, comma, com, com, yeah, yeah, yeah.
    Comma, comma, comma, comma, com, com
    They'll come running to me.

    ps: Forgot to say that your poem is splendid as always!
    Last edited by ziloo; October 16th, 2006 at 09:07 AM.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    United States, TX


    Terry the rapper.
    Apple II's Forever!!! -some guy.


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